Name four of the countless songs that reference you.
“I’m friends with Adam Green and there’s a song by Kimya Dawson, the other half of The Moldy Peaches, called ‘The Beer’ where she sings ‘Evan Dando never planned on telling the truth’. ‘Skull’ by Sebadoh is just a pure-out story about me and Lou Barlow at the Chateau Marmont doing drugs – it was a long time ago!”
“Then there’s ‘Evan’ by Juliana Hatfield; and there’s one that goes [Evan sings ‘Christmas With Evan Dando’ by The Humdrum Express] ‘I know this may sound like an unlikely tale but I once spent Christmas Day on Bondi Beach with Evan Dando’ – you have to be Googling yourself to find that one! It’s really funny.”
“There used to be song called ‘Evan Dando at the Sando’ [by Australian band McBodybag] about me showing up at the The Sandringham Hotel on King Street, Sydney.”
CORRECT.
“Have I lost? Is it good that I got them or bad?!”
Name the (officially unreleased) Oasis song you co-wrote with Noel Gallagher.
“It’s called ‘Roll With It’ [Laughs]. No – ‘Purple Parallelogram’.”
CORRECT. A version of which was originally included on promo copies of The Lemonheads’ 1996 album ‘Car Button Cloth’ – before being removed at Noel’s request.
“The reason I wasn’t allowed to use it was because I gave him this pill and he had this dream, then starts singing ‘Purple Parallelogram’ [to the tune of what became Oasis’ 1995 single ‘Roll with It’]. I’m not claiming the credit for ‘Roll With It’ – but it does have the same melody. That’s pretty loose. It wouldn’t stand up in court! But that’s what it was – even if he didn’t know it at the time. One time Noel was talking to Alan [McGee] about this and said: ‘Don’t tell my publisher this’. And Alan’s like, ‘Well, I’m your publisher!’ [Laughs]. At the time, it was bad timing, so I had to roll with it. ‘Purple Parallelogram’ wasn’t a great song, and I like ‘Roll With It’, so if I had anything to do with that, it would be cool.”
“I was on tour with Oasis for two weeks before their first record [1994’s ‘Definitely Maybe’] came out, ‘cause I couldn’t deal with going home. I’d been on tour for three-and-a-quarter years, so everyone was like: ‘Bye Ev! We’ll see you in rehab!’ – they knew something wasn’t going to go perfect.”
“I know this is extra but let me unburden myself more [Laughs]… One night we were staying in Liam’s room, ‘cause he was out all night partying. Anyway, I broke the television, the cops arrested me, and Liam walked past and was so psyched because he saw me being led out in handcuffs wearing a mohair jumper and yelled: ‘Fucking hey, John-Boy on acid! That’s Sid Vicious man!’”
When The Lemonheads performed your hit cover of ‘Mrs. Robinson’ on Top of the Pops in 1992, which Manchester singer did you impersonate at the end?
“[Evan sings various Moz lyrics in his style] ‘I don’t wanna staaaaaaaay / Give up life as a bad mistaaaakkke… / I’m too tired / I’m so sick and tired… / And your prejudice won’t keep you warm tonight / Oh, the devil will find work for idle hands to do’… Morrissey.”
CORRECT. Did he ever see it?
“Have I talked to Morrissey about it? That’s a hilarious scenario! My question to him would be: does he wear nice leather Italian shoes – and is that not murder? Morrissey actually wanted to bring us out on tour a couple of times.”
For a bonus half-point, can you recall any other act who appeared on the same episode as you?
“It was an early one, so that’s tough… Lisa Stansfield?”
CORRECT. Among others, you could have also had The Shamen, Madonna, East Side Beat and Mr Blobby.
“[Laughs] I pulled that one out of my ass – I remember talking to her pretty early on. She was cool. I’m going to start fucking up now!”
Which Lemonheads song did Courtney Love join you to perform at the London Roundhouse date of your ‘It’s A Shame About Ray’ 30th Anniversary Tour in 2022?
“‘Into Your Arms’.”
CORRECT.
“These are tough!”
Has Courtney read your recently-published autobiography ‘Rumours of My Demise’?
“[Laughs] Fuck, I hope not! I think I might not be alive [if she had].”
You talk in the book about how she’d throw whisky bottles at your head when you toured with Hole in 1993 – was she a good shot?!
“Yeah! I had to duck, dude! I had that ‘Big Gay Heart’ song which was anti-gay-bashing and she would say ‘I like violence’ and stuff like that. She was treating me like her boyfriend, and she was on me the whole time, where it looked like we were doing something.”
You allege she told Kurt Cobain she was having an affair with you to make him jealous…
“My first spiritual experience was when Kurt died [in 1994], because I felt that he knew the truth – because he went to his death not knowing. [Nirvana’s] Pat Smear told me Kurt really thought I was having an affair with Courtney. I hope I’m balanced in the book about her, but I couldn’t help saying that the first thing she said to me when grunge broke and everybody had money was: ‘Evan, this is great! We can put hits out on people now!’”
“I felt that Kurt knew the truth a lot after he died. ‘Cause me and him had this weird barrier. We were doppelgängers in a way. People who worked with us both said they couldn’t even tell who was onstage. We listened to a lot of the same music and even his singing – I think that early on, he heard our early stuff. There’s something about his voice.”
“This sounds like a podcast and it’s so boring and who-gives-a-shit, but we could have been friends and it’s a bummer. And I think we are friends now ‘cause he knows the truth. One thing Courtney always used to say was that he said his prayers every night.”
What is your character called in the 1995 film Heavy?
“Jeff.”
CORRECT. The boyfriend of Liv Tyler’s waitress character Callie.
“River Phoenix had died and [the filmmakers] said ‘you can have his part’. My vampiric glory said yes! It was wicked fun. I got there and didn’t know who Liv Tyler was – it said Liv Rundgren in her passport – but as I was kissing her, [Aerosmith’s] ‘Sweet Emotion’ was playing in my head and I realised of course!”
“Heavy was just what I needed. I stopped drinking and hung out with this really beautiful, intelligent, rock girl.”
Any other roles you’ve enjoyed?
“I turn up the end of [1994 movie] Reality Bites [as Actor Roy] and that’s the best one because it’s really funny.”
“The funniest thing was one time I sat next to Tim Robbins who was saying ‘I really like your music’ – but he’d mistaken me for Kurt Cobain! Afterwards, I saw him on the Oscars red carpet and said ‘How’s it going Tim? Remember me from the airplane?’. And he was like nah, because he really thought I was someone else. Maybe I shouldn’t have poked him in the back of his jacket.”
“But speaking of famous people’s blazers…I once went to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame with Lizzie Jagger. We went with Mick Jagger and got stuck in traffic for 45 minutes and Mick was doing all these hilarious impressions. But it’s so scary getting anywhere with him. Wherever you go, you had to hold onto his blue blazer and he said: ‘Evan, if you don’t hold onto the blazer, I don’t know what’s going to happen to you… [Laughs] HOLD ON!’. That was the night I was going to fight with [Eagles’] Don Henley. He was like: ‘Dando! You and me outside!’ Anyway, I’m over-answering…”
You can’t leave us on a cliffhanger of a punch-up with Don Henley!
“I missed my chance to say ‘Take It Easy’, man!’ [Laughs]. He would have smacked me. He’s a big dude. He wanted to take it outside, but it takes so long to get outside, he couldn’t have remained angry. He just wanted attention – I know the feeling! Next question.”
At the NME Awards USA in LA in 2008, who presented you with the Classic Album Award for The Lemonheads’ ‘It’s A Shame About Ray’?
WRONG. Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz.
“But Kelly Osbourne was there – she was hosting the awards with an Australian comedian [Jim Jefferies]. I sat with Alice Cooper, more importantly. I threw my award straight away in a bin outside after receiving it.”
Which rock icon once held a sword on you?
CORRECT. The Rolling Stone reportedly held it against your throat at his house.
“[Evan impersonates Keith’s voice] ‘You’re not on television now!’, he said. ‘I’m going to throw you in the fucking moat!’. I was like: ‘This is so awesome!’ Another time, Keith said: ‘Meet me at the bottom of the stairs in two minutes and 12 seconds’, and he’d given Liv and Kate [Moss] the same message. They showed up at the right time and he said, ‘What do I need you for Dando?’. And he fell up the stairs, like only Keith Richards can, and I accidentally stepped on him and put my foot on his chest, saying ‘I conquer thee!’. We were having a blast. He later explained: ‘You were one of my son Marlon’s friends. I had to put you through your paces. For 25 years, I’ve been watching you from afar’. He was really nice eventually – but that was scarier than him being antagonistic to me. When I was a kid, my favourite band was the Rolling Stones.”
Which two musicians’ vocals are you sandwiched between on the BBC’s all-star 1997 charity cover of Lou Reed’s ‘Perfect Day’?
“Courtney’s fucking with me again because she said I look like Tina Turner in that video! All I can think of now is Tina Turner. God, that is hard! Neneh Cherry and Lisa Stansfield? I know Huey [from the Fun Lovin’ Criminals] sings ‘yeaaah’ on it, but I don’t fucking know!”
WRONG. You appeared between Dr John and Emmylou Harris. Huey Morgan does indeed sing the line ‘Someone good… yeaaah’.
“Nice placement! The whole thing was so quick and all I can remember is Tina Turner ‘cause I’d been up for three days or something when I did the filming, but I was glad to be included in the pantheon of wankers [laughs]. That was great.”
It’s an impressive line-up that includes the late Shane MacGowan…
“Oh, I loved him and hung out with him quite a bit over the years. What a guy! At a festival in Ghent, I got invited into the Drug Tent with Shane and Lemmy where they were racking up lines of speed over a foot long – and it was wicked.”
What is track six on The Lemonheads’ latest album ‘Love Chant’?
“’Cell Phone Blues’”
CORRECT.
“You can fucking quiz me about anything and I’ll remember. But you don’t have to do it now. [Evan jokingly imitates a stereotypical British rock journo’s voice]. ‘Do it backstage man and we’ll rack up some lines’. But I don’t do that anymore [He pauses for comic effect]… I’m not doing English accents anymore.”
What was inspiring this album?
“The main one was Charles Mingus because he had a song called ‘Love Chant’, and my version is a little bit like its riff. I’m proud to be an American because of John Coltrane, Charles Mingus, Elvin Jones, Chuck Berry, Hank Williams – so it’s my desperate hanging onto my American pride by calling the record ‘Love Chant’ after Charles Mingus, who America treated like shit! The influence of Willy Mason was also huge for me. He’s so good, you’re just like ‘Fuck you, Willy!’. We pray to Willy. What else? ‘Taking Tiger Mountain (By Strategy)’ by Brian Eno – we were aiming for an Eno/Roxy Music vibe. We wanted to make a coherent, classic record. It was as simple as: ‘What do I want to hear right now? Let’s make it.’”
What flowers adorned the dress you once wore onstage during a The Lemonheads set at Reading festival?
“Daisies?”
CORRECT.
The verdict: 8.5/10
“That seems like an alright score!”
The Lemonheads’ latest album ‘Love Chant’ is available now. The band tour the UK in 2026. For full live dates, see here. Evan Dando’s memoir, ‘Rumours of My Demise’ is published by Faber & Faber