Who’s the coolest person on the planet right now? The NME Cool List is back to bring you the answer. Who’s in? Who’s out? And most importantly, who’s number one? Buy this week’s issue for the full list, amazing pictures of the top 50 and all the reasons why they rock. But first, read what we’re looking for…
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF COOL
1. WEAR THE UNWEARABLE: If you carry off a look that’s better suited to the blind or bipolar, you is da shiz.
2. TERRORISE THE MAINSTREAM: There’s nothing cooler than making Jools Holland shit himself.
3. CULTIVATE THE ENIGMA: The less we know about you, the more we want to orally pleasure you in multi-storey car parks.
4. BE COMFORTABLE WITH ‘COOL’: The cool never say they’re cool. They know they’re cool. Knowing you’re not cool is not cool.
5. HAVE PHYSICS-DEFYING HAIR: Cool used to be about how little you could see through your fringe; now it’s about how much Cochrane you’ve got in your curl.
6. BEEF UP THE BEEFS: Nothing says ‘fuck you, Media Training Advisor!’ more than slagging off other acts in print with nary a care for who your dressing room is pitched next to at the festivals.
7. DITCH THE THERAPIST: Cheering up is the new moping about like a twat.
8. COMEBACK WITH CONFIDENCE: Every Tom, Dick and Dodgy is reforming, so give us every ounce of nostalgia with nobs on.
9. INNOVATE: Credibility comes wrapped in fresh ideas as naturally as Odd Future records come wrapped in parental warning stickers.
10. JUST ‘HAVE IT’: Sorry ‘Dalston Superstars’: some people are descended from a strata of our species known as Homo Bossasfookus.
Also in this issue, a special report looking at which bands will headline the festivals next year. Who’s booking The Killers? Have Muse signed a contract already? Can any tempt The Libs out of retirement, or have The Stone Roses snaffled up all the cash? Find out inside.
As well as that, The Clash’s Mick Jones tells us how he was The Libertines’ lion tamer. Funny that, we always thought they preferred the horse. Mark Ronson reveals he’s working with Katy B, but that right now it sounds like “a fucking mess”, while Odd Future’s latest breakout star Frank Ocean hits London.
Plus the verdict on Kate Bush’s brand new album and the UK’s biggest and best gig guide.
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